Thursday, September 28, 2006

Bomb-Greetings from Children in Israel

The pictures of Israeli children writing "greetings" on the bombs destined for Lebanon were widely distributed in the Internet and newspapers of the Arab world and received with shock and anger there. The Western mass media on the other hand kept a very low profile on this matter which reflects the general reaction of the West to Israel's way of handling this latest crisis – not without worrying consequences.

Shortly after the publication of the photos of Israeli children writing "greetings" on bombs to be fired into Lebanon I watched a newsmagazine on German satellite TV in which a German lady was waiting to be evacuated from Lebanon during the recent war between Israel and Hezbollah. At the end of her interview she was crying and said that she liked to say something else, if she was allowed. Her wish was granted. She wanted to say that she was very disappointed about the biased reporting of the Western media and then she began to weep about the fate of the people trapped in the South and the many children, who were being bombed without having shelters and had not been given enough time to escape the area. After a few sentences she was not able to continue.

I watched with tears in my eyes and remembered the disgusting pictures I had seen the very same morning for the first time in a German online magazine, photos of smiling young Israeli girls writing "greetings" on the bombs that the Israeli army was to fire into Lebanon. The recipients of these "greetings" I saw too later on Arabic TV and in their newspapers. Pictures that were only rarely published if at all by the Western media, for which the viewers, one has to admit, needed a very strong stomach.

As the war dragged on international politicians, advisors and anyone concerned started to express their regret about the human loss of life and the devastation, but an official stand from the UN on mounting concerns over violations of public international laws by Israel was prevented by a veto from the USA which did not allow the Israeli government to be criticized by the international community for its actions. Why? Anyone causing such humanitarian catastrophes should be criticized, even the Israeli government. Whoever was declared responsible for initiating that war, according to the different sides, however, it is common sense that the weaker military has only two options either to defend itself or to surrender, but the stronger army is the one that can give way. Only Israel had the power to end the sufferings of the people in Lebanon right away at any time. In consideration of the many pictures of traumatized children, increasing refugee tracks and destructed city areas, not to mention the horrible images of terrible injuries and torn apart bodies, people in the West kept a very low profile on expressing their indignations in public about such mass punishment of civilians. "Never again" is probably only a shallow hope voiced after man made humanitarian catastrophes.

As photos often say more than words, people in the West should have the courage to view these pictures seldom or never shown in the Western media, but in "aljazeera.com", "english.aljazeera.net" or "gdn.com.bh" (e.g. Archive 14 July 2006). And as if the war has not already done enough harm there are many duds still crippling so many innocent Lebanese civilians to this day even though the fighting has ended. But these pictures will probably not be shown in the Western press anyway. Is shame or fear or, even worse, lack of interest the reason for turning a blind eye? Muslims and Arabs consequently accused the West of double standards and concluded that Muslim or Arab lives were considered less worthy despite all talk of human rights and humanitarian values.

Despite Western friendships with Israel, the governments of the Western states should have had the courage to criticize Israel for the methods used by her superior military power during four weeks of aggression and the Western public should have come out in noisy demonstrations other than the few silent vigils and the small protests organized by Muslims or Arab nationals in some Western cities. Where were the Western democratic masses demonstrating in support of the innocent civilians killed in their hundreds in Lebanon just as Western public voices had time and again demanded of Muslims and Arabs after the acts of terror in the USA, Spain and Great Britain? The worrying outcome of this latest war is that the world seems to become more polarized into two camps, the one supporting and the other one against the State of Israel diminishing the chances of security and peace for both sides; a situation Bin Laden & Co. was probably just waiting for.

Wednesday, September 27, 2006

The Threat of "Islamic" Terrorism


A look at possible backgrounds


The most valuable experience I made during my studies in England, which I began in 1987 at London University, was that I got to know so many students from all over the world, from so many different cultures and religions. This was a very exciting and moving period of my life.


During my first meeting at an international students' meeting in London I saw a very nice looking couple smiling at me. We were all there to get to know other students and thus I asked them where they came from. They were from Israel. These students were the first Israelis and probably also the first people of the Jewish faith that I had met in my life. Their answer made me feel very helpless and I got these pinching feelings of guilt. Hence, my reply in return felt so uncomfortable, but the young couple was ever so friendly and I was relieved that they did not seem to have any problem with the fact that I came from Germany.


I met many nice people and came across so many points of views new to me which made me reflect about my own convictions. At the time of the first Palestinian 'Intifada' I became a witness of a discussion between students among whom were also some Palestinians. One of them said that it was totally sick if some Arabs liked the Germans specifically for their Nazi past. This was the reason that the people whom the Germans had sinned against thought since 1948 that it was justified to sin against his own people while the world was just watching. I felt very uncomfortable and somehow responsible even though I was born only in 1965.


At my student part-time job I made friends with a Moroccan girl. I asked her why her Arabic was not easily understood by the Arabs from the Middle East and why she seemed to prefer to speak in French. She replied that the French had forbidden the Arabic language in schools during their colonization of Morocco so that the generations since then spoke better French. I was shocked. What did the French prohibit in Arabic schools, the native people's own mother tongue? In my A-Level subjects History and French I had received very different impressions about my dear country neighbors. I neither recall having heard in any of our lessons about the "country of one million martyrs", a name given to Algeria after their liberation from the French occupation. If one country is able to do such things to another country, does it then not also practice a form of extremism and fanaticism we often accuse Muslims of, only that time committed by European nationals? Should we accept it because of its European origin and consider it to be better or justified?


Once a big crowd drew my attention in the famous Hyde Park Speaker's Corner that was listening to a Pakistani man, who (which I found out later) was married to a British lady and wanted to make people think about their own thinking – in a very nice manner. He picked a white blond haired man from the crowd and asked him where he came from. The man replied that he was Australian. The speaker did as if he was puzzled and commented that to his knowledge Australians had dark skin and curly brown hair. The Australian answered that those people were called 'aborigines' and they had just happened to be there earlier than them (i.e. the Australians). The speaker enthusiastically agreed with the Australian because he told us that this was actually the same case in Great Britain which now belonged to the Pakistanis and the British had just happened to be there earlier than them. All people had to laugh. Did they laugh about themselves or because they suddenly realized the absurdity of their convictions?


As I studied at the School of Oriental and African Studies I also had the opportunity to meet students from South Africa, some were white, some black, who had two different national languages. I only remember that I was surprised that the language mainly spoken by the white South Africans, of all names called 'Afrikaans', resembled Dutch very much. The history of Africa had never been thoroughly covered at school. I had heard of apartheid, but only after I had personally met black and white people from South Africa did I realize what terrible sufferings the colored nationals of that country had been subjected to.


Nowadays we are witnessing or some are experiencing new sufferings for which a number of circumstances are made responsible, which are mainly known to us as "Islamic or Islamist terrorism". At this point I would like to comment on such terrorists or terrorism which I do not accept to entitle 'Islamic', because this form of terrorism contradicts the principles of the name it tries to borrow and therefore does not deserve to be named after it, for the brutal murderers will receive some kind of justification through it. These people are blood thirsty fanatics that have as much in common with Islam as President Bush with the Merciful Samaritans, and who are above all interested in one thing – revenge, in a fight for power in the course of which the ordinary people pay the price far too high. We should not forget that these kind of people have existed back in time, who practice terror in the name of their religion even within their own faith, such as the Catholics and Protestants in Northern Ireland, who are not consequently called "Christian" terrorists. Their motives are political even if they hold their speeches in the name of their religion and even if they want to persuade the rest of the world to believe them by hiding under the cover of religion.


As European Muslim I am certainly concerned about this subject and try to inform myself as thoroughly as possible. In the articles of the Western press I often read that many things are mixed up too easily, such as the integration problems of Muslim immigrants, the hate speeches of psychopathic Muslim preachers and the adherence to old discriminating traditions for Muslim women (which are misleadingly claimed to be Islamic) and the power-political interests of Islamic countries like the discussion about Iran's atomic program. All these subjects are intermingled which only increases the fear of the people instead of encouraging a reasonable debate about the different subjects.


Living in the Middle East, I hear local people discuss these subjects from their point of view. During a talk show on an Arabic satellite channel one Arabic participant became very agitated over the fact that Muslims are considered to be the terrorists who were not responsible for the cruel crusades, neither for the atomic bomb on Hiroshima nor the napalm bombs on Vietnam and who also had not colonized countries in the Third World for their natural resources leading to an exploitation till this day. Leave alone the war with which the USA had decided to rid Iraq of Saddam Hussain that had led to more bloodshed and unspeakable sufferings. Obviously upset he asked if this was not considered terrorism.


From a Western point of view the perceived silence or non-reaction from Muslims to the present-day terrorism is interpreted as "support" for the terrorists from Islamic countries or Muslims. One could argue that more public protest from the Muslims would help to set a clear sign and that there are also some Muslims whose lack of public reaction is a kind of accepted compensation for the violence and discrimination the people of the Third and Developing World had to suffer under their Western colonialists or protectorates. This kind of thinking is certainly wrong, but we have to understand that it mainly originates from personal emotions and instinct and is therefore not based on Islamic principles or thoughts. On the contrary, Islamic clerics and the absolute majority of Muslims condemn such terror again and again very strongly in their mosques and community centers (that is not reported about very often in the Western media), because such terror is not only strictly forbidden in Islam but it also badly damages the reputation of Muslims.


However, I think as a result of many talks I had with people living in the Middle East that they are as afraid of Western powers as the people in the West are frightened of them. Both sides sense a great threat from the other side and naturally would want to protect themselves. Both sides have their reasons and fears that have been accumulated throughout the years and which need to be understood by the other side. Besides the personal responsibilities of the people for their bad living standards in the Third World it is impossible to apologize for the injustice that was inflicted on them by colonial powers or by the political and economical interference of Western states. This injustice can neither be rectified with development aid. The wounds are too deep and the consequences too devastating. Having been exploited, living in poverty and misery compared to the wealthy and privileged West makes people feel angry and powerless resulting in a longing for justice and recovery of their dignity.


In Islam, as in all religions, doing good deeds is one of the central virtues. In the Quran there is a verse (Sura 99, Verse 7 & 8) saying: "Then shall anyone who has done an atom's weight of good, see it! And anyone who has done an atom's weight of evil, shall see it." Doing bad deeds therefore shall one day fire back on the aggressor. My sister once told me many years ago as a student that her lecturer of operational pedagogic studies (who used to be the head of several Goethe Institutes) had voiced his opinion with regard to the subject 'justice' that we (in the West) would be very silly to believe that the Third World would not pay back what we had done to them once they had the means to do so. I sincerely hope that 9/11 was not the first pay day!

Thursday, September 21, 2006

Wedding in an Islamic Country

Weddings are popular everywhere in the world. However, arranged marriages as practiced in some cultures remain a point of discussion and concern. How about the practice of forced marriage in Arabia today?


For more than 16 years I have been living in Arabia, or more precisely in the Persian Gulf, which the Arabs prefer to call "Arabian Gulf". I also used to live for almost one year in Egypt where I studied in the British Center at the University of Alexandria. Destiny, as it sometimes happens, took me, a native European woman, abroad to a different and strange world beyond the European and Western borders.


Living among the people of Arabia I noticed that some of their less admirable traditions and customs have changed too. As long as I have lived here I have not heard about any unlucky girl being forced to marry someone she did not accept, unlike the practice of our Turkish citizens in Europe, a point of great concern especially in Germany. According to Islamic law forcing a woman to marry against her will is forbidden and no one should be able to drag a girl in front of a clergy to marry a man she does not agree with. As per Islamic law the clergy should ask the woman if she agrees to marry a man without coercion and out of her own free will! During my Islamic marriage-ceremony I was asked so many times if I really wanted this man out of my own desire, without compulsion or false pretext, not against my will, without fearing the anger of any person or family that I became impatient; in church you are asked once and that should do. However, the Islamic clergy should make sure beyond any doubt that the woman is not forced to marry a man. Well, kind of. Unfortunately, some of our Muslim brothers do not handle this issue as correctly as required, because their traditions and family interests seem to be holier in such cases. That is why the girls need to be "persuaded" so they "want" to marry the man who has been chosen for them.


Well, luckily I have made totally different experiences in my new residence country. Whether the future couple has met at university or work or was introduced by a match maker, the intention to marry begins with a preliminary proposal. The usual 'tactic' is that a female member of the applicant's family will ask another female member of the chosen girl's family, or nowadays the girl herself, if she is interested in a marriage with the guy who would like to propose officially. The girl's family will then ask around to find out as much information about the applicant as possible, his conduct and environment as well as people's opinions and any possible drawbacks. If the profile fits, the girl will agree to a visit from the applicant including his family. The two young people will then have the opportunity to talk face to face with each other (if this has not already happened at university or wherever they might have met before in public). Thanks to modern technology they might continue to communicate by telephone or via the Internet if they feel that they like each other.


If both interested parties have become attracted to each other during the time that they get to know each other under supervision, then the families would meet again in order to discuss the marriage contract and some wedding ceremony arrangements. In most cases, the daughter has already prepared her dad about what to demand for her marriage contract. I was personally present during some of these visits in which the men would loudly discuss the bride's conditions so that we could hear them despite of us sitting in a separate place of the house according to tradition. The women meanwhile would talk about other questions of interest such as family relations or if the bride intends to work after marriage.
Once the men have reached an agreement they would inform the women who would announce the happy outcome with a loud yodeling noise. Finally, they would serve the many delicacies that the guests could already smell during the negotiations but that had to wait until both sides would have come to a satisfactory agreement. It has, of course, already happened that no agreement was reached and the applicant family preferred to leave with empty stomachs, as the question of the bride's dowry (to be paid by the groom) or the conditions of the marriage contract sometimes divide the two sides. But most of the time these discussions have been predefined by the young couple with their family beforehand as they have fallen in love by then and the families only meet to decide the date of the official wedding contract signing. In this event a cleric will ask the bride many times if she really wants to marry that man, how much dowry she demands and what conditions she has. For example, she could demand a suitable indemnity in case her husband divorced her, or to register the family home in her name for her security, in case of him marrying a second wife. And because love is known to be blind the bride's family will make sure that such conditions are taken care of properly. With regard to the opportunities that such conditions may offer, women are becoming more inventive how to protect their interests and rights realizing that pretended modesty is of no advantage to them.


After the marriage-contract signing has been performed in a relatively simple party-kind procedure, there will first be an engagement party (and I have no idea why it is called that) for which the bride usually wears a colored dress. During the time after this party the young couple has the opportunity to get closer without the need of an overseer to be present when they are alone, because according to Islamic law they are already legally married. However, the bride will stay in her parents' home until she is ready to move in with her husband. Before they are finally declared as married there will be another "wedding party" with a white bride dress according to Western custom copied from the romantic Hollywood movies. After that the couple will receive well-wishers and many gifts in their own new home.


It also happens that the young people after falling madly in love with each other marry against the will of their families, who have no choice but to accept the new son or daughter-in-law either with or without their consent. Nowadays the families cannot prevent such marriages anymore as in the old times.


The girl who refuses an applicant may certainly do so by all means. In case of an applicant having difficulties to accept a refusal he might be rebuffed in a more "direct" way by the girl's male family members. My eldest daughter, who is still too young for marriage, already had to rebuff her first proposal. As mother of two European/Arabic-mix girls that are very popular for their fair complexion in this part of the world I have already mentally prepared myself for the applicants who might come to our door more often from now on and who will have to be rebuffed, because, luckily, my daughters have already declared that they do not intend to get married for the next hundred years. I think that is a wise decision and I hope they will not change their minds for the next 10 years. At least.

Thursday, September 14, 2006

Different Countries Different Customs

That you really get to know if you live abroad, such as "Caution, don't smile!"

When someone lives abroad s/he will find out about the customs and habits that are not mentioned in any travel guide. For example you better not say hello smiling when entering a shop in the traditional Arabic market, the 'Souq'. That was my first lesson, which I learned about my new residence country in the Persian Gulf after I had entered one of these small shops filled with all kinds of goods up to its ceiling and greeted the people inside with a polite smile as per my friendly European manners.

Both Asian shop assistants would serve me straight away and smiled funnily back at me. I didn't think of anything at that time, because they must have recognized my European origin despite wearing a headscarf and the Arabic Abaya, the traditional long overcoat. I asked for the things I was looking for and the shop assistants put the many different goods taken out of somewhere in this small and packed shop right in front of me. First I didn't notice anything because I was amazed how all these things could fit into such a tiny shop. All of a sudden I became aware that the two shop assistants would not keep the expected distance as prescribed by traditional behaviour rules between the two genders. I was confused, had I said or done something to encourage them? I only wanted to be polite and kind.
Luckily, at that moment a native lady entered the shop and the shop assistants turned around to serve the lady, not because they were being impolite towards me, but because the lady had loudly interrupted us (which suited me just fine at that time). Following I had the opportunity to witness a remarkable lesson on local behaviour manners between a customer and shop assistant that I haven't forgotten after all those years. The lady neither said 'hello' nor 'please' or 'thank you'. In a sharp voice without looking at any of the shop assistants she instructed her requirements like an army officer. She answered the questions of the shop assistants with a short 'yes' or 'no' in an order type tone of voice. After she received an answer for the price she kind of barked a snappish "and last", which actually means "and what is your last price?" The whole treatment seemed to be normal for the shop assistants because they showed themselves totally unimpressed and reacted in a kind and polite way as normal.

The lady finished her purchase and left the shop. The shop assistants returned back to me with that big grin on their faces again. I thought to myself I can what she could and thus I stopped smiling and put on a stern look. Right away the shop assistants kept a proper distance and then I was quickly served without making a strange pass at me. Voila, a little unusual for me, but it had worked, so I left the shop and sneered. Well then, 'different countries, different customs' I thought to myself, so let's wait and see what experience I should make next.
I did not have to wait for long. As newly wedded couple we had visitors the same evening at the house of my in-laws where we would stay until our own flat was ready. The guests I had not met before were welcomed extremely friendly and I was greeted as cordially from the ladies who were very curious to meet me, the European Muslim woman they said would also speak Arabic. I was glad that among so many noisy looks we were only among women as per local customs that I knew of before. After the guests had left, my husband came to me and asked if I did not want to open the gifts that the guests had brought for us. What gifts? Nobody had presented me with a gift. My husband's family had to giggle. Yes, they did! But the gifts were all hidden behind the door or the couch. I wondered about this strange Easter egg hiding game and then we pulled the gifts from behind the furniture.

It is custom that gifts are not presented to the person directly but they are brought in and then put quietly somewhere without attracting attention. Only after the guests have left you are allowed to uncover the gifts and share your joy or disappointment in the presence of your family who would put their oar in with a satisfactory remark or else a sneer. That is actually very convenient, no public opening of gifts in front of guests anticipating your reaction, nor the need to pretend false joy. You can thank someone for a really nice gift later either by phone or in person whenever the opportunity arises - no rush necessary. The gifts that you do not like can be given away which is not a resented but a very common practice. Contrariwise, it is extremely embarrassing to open gifts in front of the person who presented it, as my husband's aunt had to experience when she came with me to visit my own family. The poor woman was not able in the end to open her gift and was very grateful to her European host for her understanding, as she had visited the Persian Gulf before and knew about the gift presenting custom.

Many things have changed since Western customs have become known in this part of the world through the globalization process. Modern shopping malls are copies of their Western models and favorite American soap operas and talk shows have become part of the daily evening entertainment program. However, the small shops in the 'Souq' still exists and the hospitality customs in the villages too. May be I should write them all down one day before they are sucked away by modern development, which has embraced the Middle East during the past two decades at a dizzy speed.

Wednesday, September 13, 2006

The Fading Social State – Facing Reality

As native European observer from abroad I am getting the impression that life has changed ...

... in Germany, as in the rest of Western Europe, with regard to our economy that no one sees as a wonder anymore but only wonders about. With the help of satellite television and annual family visits it seems to me that the same is true for the situation of our education that according to the PISA study revokes the reputation of having the highest educational standards in the world. People are beginning to question the image of our model social states that have previously created the impression in the rest of the world that milk and honey flow in our rivers with the result that Western Europe has become a favorite immigration continent. Values that are proclaimed in our national anthems such as unity, rights and freedom or equality and brotherliness no longer reflect the situation on our labour market, in politics or religious tolerance. Social descent and the increasing number of people living below the poverty line are hidden behind so-called promising social and labour scheme reforms.

Even as European emigrant I remain European which bestows some sort of responsibility on me for my native continent. But what does that look like? Well, first of all as emigrants we still have the right to vote in our native country's general elections. Our forefathers have long fought for this right and for women it might be even more precious. However, when living abroad it is difficult to choose and make up one's mind. Politicians usually hold impressive speeches during their election campaigns (which I occasionally watch on satellite TV) that they may or may not remember afterwards when they increase their parliamentary allowances as a precaution for worsening times that the others soon will have, for instance single-parents or the unemployed. New reforms, as promised, may change but not always improve things, although they were carefully developed by competent but probably not unemployed experts just like Mr. Hartz in Germany, who does not have to live on a few Euro a month, but who gave the labor and social reforms his name. How appropriate! Considering all election propaganda and promises dished up by the politicians during their campaign it appeared as if we were given the choice between Ali Baba and the 40 thieves or the Punch (the reader may decide for him-/herself who is who).
It seems once again that the rich become richer and the poor poorer in Europe. However, abroad far away from Europe and its internal problems I still profit from Western Europe's exemplary reputation for our strong economies, jurisdiction, constitutional and social states in which people receive unemployment and social benefits unlike in the rich but non-social states of Asia. For example, Islamic states rely on their Sharia law according to which the ones that have give a fifth of their accumulated wealth to the have-nots that is not regulated by governments and thus totally up to each individuals commitment to his/her religion.
The fact that the situation is not as florid as in the post second world war decades has not been quite accepted by the developing world. Although it is difficult to admit, but it can no longer be ignored that Western Europe is not as social as it used to be. Germany for example has lost its charismatic personalities in politics and is more and more governed by people who seem to use their political values and beliefs mainly for marketing purposes and who want to talk the population into believing new unsocial laws to be a necessity for the improvement of social affairs.

Who is responsible for this situation? The politicians? The citizens themselves? The immigrants? The extension of the European Union into Eastern Europe? Capitalism? People's strive for increasing consumption with which they manipulate their own brains? What is still significant and for whom? Is it high time to awake from the sleeping beauty dream of the prosperous years? No one can say for sure and probably it is a combination of many factors. But I have noticed something from the point of an outside observer; many people have exchanged their political interest with watching popular entertainment shows that have also had an influence on the presentation style and contents of news programs. Somehow there is not much time left beside job and daily life routine for more concern about national or international political issues and an interest in actively engaging oneself in political parties or organizations. Looking at our young and famous these days it seems that general knowledge has been replaced by a sound information background on popular soap operas, reality documentaries and the lifestyle of pop or movie stars and high society. And what about politics? Sometimes I get the impression that a group of people with political and economical power pretends to serve their nation, however not always very effectively nor efficiently because there are all too busy quarrelling about who has the better reform ideas and power to implement them. May be it will help the people, may be not, but that is not so important, because no one is prepared to take any responsibility for their broken promises and the things that went wrong.
The European citizens meanwhile are watching in despair and disbelieve that things are not improving despite all well-meant intentions. As I no longer live in Europe I do not want to interpret my impressions as judgment, but I also know after having lived half of my life in Europe, grew up and received my education there that the European civilization will not lose its social consciousness because of hard times or new challenges. May be we might become inspired again by bethinking our rich literature written by poets and writers once famous and admired in history.

There is a poem by a German poet and writer which we had to discuss in secondary school that keeps coming to my mind in this respect. I think it might be of interest again, especially in times of social deterioration and political dissatisfaction.
Günther Eich (1907 – 1972): BE SAND IN THE GEARINGS OF THE WORLD!
"No, don't sleep,
while the stewards of the world are busy!
Be suspicious of their power,
that they pretend they must acquire for you!
Keep vigil that your hearts are not empty,
when they rely on the emptiness of your hearts!
Do useless things; sing the songs,
which are not expected out of your mouth!
Be inconvenient; be sand not the oil in the gearings of the world!"
(from: Günther Eich/"Dreams")
In other words, don't be ignorant but be aware while others control your life.